What New, Physical Phuckery is This?
Lately, working out isn’t working for me, in that, my body is rebelling in ways that make me want to take it out back and beat the living crap out of it.
Maybe that’s the problem. I’ve beaten the living crap out of it.
I haven’t gone to the gym in a long time because I need new workout shoes and I’ve been too cheap to buy them. That’s a failing of mine. I let something totally fall apart before it’s ultimately replaced.
Yet, I’ve been wearing these shoes at home when I work out. Which is every day. They’re Nikes and they’ve served me well for years. Except now, they’re not, as the poor things need to be retired and in turn, my poor feet are shot.
A couple of weeks ago, I hopped on a rebounder, or mini-trampoline, that my sister gave me and bounced barefoot for fifteen minutes. I’ve used these in the past and never had any issues, but, I always wore shoes.
The next day, after running on the treadmill in those Nikes that have absolutely no cushioning left, I got back on the tramp, again, barefoot. This time, when I stepped off, I couldn’t feel the bottoms of my feet. They were numb.
Since then, I have been experiencing significant acheage in my hamstrings and, on top of that, a fairly constant “pins and needles” feeling in my feet. As if they’re constantly asleep. Now, anyone who experiences this level of discomfort regularly knows what a toll it takes both physically and emotionally.
Althought I’m not diabetic, which is often a catalyst for nerve pain, the deal with my feet is known as neuropathy, where the nerves have been pinched (due to ill-fitting shoes) or damaged from performing high-impact exercise (also in shitty shoes) or a host of other crap that all amounts to the same thing: It sucks. Poor circulation is another cause of the constant tingling sensation.
Years ago, I suffered from plantar fasciitis, another lovely condition where the fascia, the thick band of tissue that runs from the heel to the toes, becomes inflamed and hurts like a mofo. For this bit of phuckery, I had to see a podiatrist regularly for hella painful shots in the bottom of both feet that worked for about…